A Frozen Woman by Annie Erneaux
This an autobiographical novel about marriage and motherhood. Victim-y tone, but some good observations.
Archives for December 2008
Is this thing on?
Yes…ish.
Having children is time consuming.
I have been sick as well as experiencing the vertigo stuff that might just be too much coffee, not enough water.
I am going to begin to record the books I read. Record. That’s it. No reviews or pontifications, just an acknowledgment, a sort of belly rub after the last swallow.
Yesterday I read, “The Underneath” by Kathi Appelt. It made me weep…not just cry. It’s a seductive, beautiful read. Hassan like.
Eden had an all Kindergarten Gingerbread concert Friday and it was FANTASTIC. Pictures to follow. My computer is struggling, so I’m posting on Paul’s.
Hope everyone is well.
One of the crappy things about my job is that I don’t always know when I am doing well, that is being a good mother. In some situations good mothering feels like bad, for example, when you are required to peel off a sobbing Kindergartner, hand her to an aide and gently shut the classroom door on both of them. Walking down the hall you might tell yourself that it’s Monday, the child is: tired, missing her dad and still processing yesterday’s frosting fest. You may recall how you lovingly tucked her in the night before and then got her up and going, jollying her through all the morning preparations. You might even remind yourself of how strong willed this child is and that she doesn’t need the message if she whines and cries loud enough and drags her feet long enough, she will get her way. But none of this will keep you from bursting into tears when you get into your car to drive home. Or at least it didn’t keep me.
I am tired too and sick. I’m reminding myself of all the reasons why this is especially hard for me today as well. And I’m praying.
UPDATE: In the heat of the moment I promised to come to school for lunch. It didn’t help the situation, but I had to follow through, whether or not she remembered. Christopher and I got there early and sat at the end of her class’ table. She sailed in with her class, gave us both a hug and then went and sat between a couple of her friends on the other end of the table. I chatted with the aide who told me that Eden accompanied her to the office with attendance and after that she was fine. When it was time to go to recess, she started wrapping around me again, but managed to divest myself with no tears from her or me.
It’s that time of year
Today was the day to decorate cookies. The place was Torey’s. We had a new member on our team. You can see her pictured above, she’s the one with her britches hanging over her waist band. She didn’t get her little mitts on any cookies, but she definitely brought something to the table. And then there were the usual suspects:
You all know C. Riley H.
Here we have the lovely and talented Lydia, aka Birdie.
Eden goes by many aliases, don’t be fooled by the sweet and semi toothless smile.
Rendini couldn’t wait to start.
I’ll post more soon.
We decorated the tree this afternoon and evening. It was a relaxed and lazy day. We had ice cream for dinner and then Christopher made up a couple bowls of popcorn to munch on while they watched a Christmas video. Lydia and Eden doubled up in one of the chairs to share a bowl. I glanced over at them, Eden perched on Lydia’s lap, Lydia’s arm around her, patting her leg lovingly like I do and was struck by how sweet and sisterly they looked.
Lydia is only eleven, but at 5′ 5″ and gaining, she is looking more and more like a young lady and she has always been an old soul. Eden is almost six and getting so big, but is still little and definitely the baby of our family. At this stage the five and a half years between them is so vast. Looking at them this evening I imagined them both grown, perhaps with children of their own, the years between them nothing at all.
I wanted to take a picture of them together, as they are today, a big and little sister, but Paul is away with our camera. And then I remembered Photobooth and took the photo above.