Alison Hodgson

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Archives for April 2012

The choice in the gap between our talent and our desire

April 24, 2012 by Alison Hodgson 2 Comments

Jana Riess, in her  session at The Festival on memoir, recommended “The Getaway Car: A Practical Memoir about Writing and Life” by Ann Patchett and referenced this,
I believe that, more than anything else, this grief of constantly having to face down our own inadequacies is what keeps people from being writers. Forgiveness, therefore, is key. I can’t write the book I want to write, but I can and will write the book I am capable of writing. Again and again throughout the course of my life I will forgive myself.

I like it because it acknowledges the disappointment that comes from not measuring up to our desire.


Filmmaker David Shiyang Liu created a wonderful video based on Ira Glass’ thoughts on the creative process.


The last workshop I attended at Festival was a panel with Susan Isaacs, Mark Richard and Scott Teems. 
I chose it because I had wanted to see Isaacs and missed her other sessions. This panel was to be on 
“Navigating Faith and Work: Hollywood and the Writer” which wasn’t of particular interest to me, but 
I enjoyed it. 


Mark Richard talked going to New York and meeting up with a bunch of other southern writers “because 
that’s what Southerners do when we get to New York — we find each other.” After, I don’t know how 
many years, there was only Richard and another woman who made it. Richard said it wasn’t because he 
was the most talented, but because he didn’t give up.


Teems said, “What challenges you the most doesn’t challenge your talent, it challenges your desire to be
a writer.”


This seems to contradict what Ira Glass is saying, but it doesn’t. So many of us surrender our desire to write
when we come to terms with the realities of our lack of talent. For many, it doesn’t occur to us that our
abilities are organic and that writing is first and always a practice.


In “Your Life as Story”(Which I highly recommend to those structuring memoirs) Tristine Rainer says, 
“…the central character should have a clear desire line—it can bend, it can turn unexpectedly, but it should
 not break; it should be intense and continuous.”


When we get clear on what we want: to write, and what we need to do: to write, then it gets pretty simple—
rarely easy—but simple, and our desire can carry us through.







Filed Under: despair, Festival of Faith and Writing, hope, writing

April 23, 2012 by Alison Hodgson 6 Comments

photo: Sandi Gunnett

I’ve just returned from the Festival of Faith and Writing.

It’s wonderful to spend three days winging from workshop to workshop soaking in the words of all sorts of writers. Add to that seeing dear friends and friendly acquaintances and it is so rich.

And yet a fatigue always sets in. To start, it’s the introvert’s Olympics. I am an introvert in the strictest sense: I get my energy being alone, so constantly being in a crowd, even a crowd of fellow word nerds is exhausting. Invariably another fatigue overcomes me that can be best attributed to overexposure to over earnestness.

When you gather a pack of writers you will hear quite a bit about the difficulties the writer faces. God, and anyone who has sat down in front of a blank screen to write something true and good, knows they exist and yet, I’m really turned off by overwrought speakers.

When we talk about writing, no matter how it might feel, regardless of how scary it can be, at the end of  the day, unless we’re imbedded with the military, most of us are sitting in a chair and facing a screen in a safe and comfortable space.

And that is hard enough.

We don’t do ourselves any favors being histrionic.

The writers who resonate with me the most are those who are deeply serious about the world, but about themselves, not so much.

https://alisonhodgson.com/2012/04/106/

Filed Under: writing

Breakfast in Bed

April 10, 2012 by Alison Hodgson Leave a Comment

You might notice that this dear girl’s eyes look a touch squinty. Poison ivy, or oak or any number of things was the culprit. Fortunately she’s doing well.

The other day I wasn’t feeling so hot. It was one of the last days of spring break. The kids were all sleeping in and I got up early with Paul but wanted to go back to bed. My reflexive shame kicked in and the monkeys starting beating drums, “You’re so lazy. You’re such a loser. You will NEVER finish your proposal.” (It almost always comes back to the stinking proposal, but that’s another story.)

I went downstairs to get a cup of coffee and realized I was hungry. In a rare moment of self compassion  I decided to make myself breakfast in bed.

Later, when Eden got up, she came to my room and saw the tray on my bed and asked what I was doing and I told her.

“You just said my dream out loud.”

“What?”

“It’s my dream to have breakfast in bed.”

“I’ve made you breakfast in bed.”

“But I had to ask for it. My dream is to just wake up and – there it is. You know?”

I did. As much as I preach the need to “Make a request” it is so lovely when someone knows you so well and surprises you with exactly what you want. I tucked away the reminder to do this for Eden some day soon.

Paul is sick today. He has finally learned to just take a day and get a lot of rest in order to avoid dragging for a couple of weeks.  He called into work and then put himself back to bed. Eden and I left him alone until late in the morning I asked her to sneak into the bedroom and get something off my nightstand.

She brought it right back with the report that Paul was stirring. “We could make him breakfast in bed!”

I asked if he was really awake. She assured me he was. I should have run up myself to double check, but Eden already had a tray and was picking out Paul’s favorite bowl. I didn’t even know he had one.

While Eden poured the milk and cereal, I doctored up a mug of coffee, grabbed a napkin, a spoon and a pretty dish towel. Eden stripped a small branch from the redbud in a vase on our table and I filled a little  glass bowl with water. These niceties, I don’t want to say they’re wasted on Paul, but they’re really for Eden and me, I know.

Eden led the way, I carried the tray and the dogs followed along.

Unfortunately Paul was snuggled under the blankets, fast asleep. Eden crept to his side and whispered, “Do you want breakfast, Daddy?”
“No thank you.” He whispered back, ever polite.
I carried the tray to his side. “Honey, Eden made you breakfast in bed.” He opened his eyes, took in the tray and then we exchanged a glance. 

We both knew he just needed to sleep and yet… Paul rolled over and pushed up onto his elbow. I gently set the tray on the bed. He took a few sips of coffee and ate a couple bites of cereal then thanked Eden. We left him to go back to sleep with the big black dog sprawled beside him.

Years ago, not too long after my dad died, I said to a friend who was a social worker with Hospice, “Don’t you feel like you know so much more about how to support someone who has lost a loved one?” I had learned so much as my dad was sick and dying about the logistics of suffering and assumed she, who had walked with dozens of families through the valley of the shadow, would be even more equipped.

An expression I can only describe as stricken, came across her face. “You know, I actually feel less prepared than before. I have seen time after time, something that would be perfect to say to or do for “that” family is the last thing that would be supportive for “this” one. I’m actually stressed that, no matter what, I’m going to say or do the wrong thing.”

When someone we care about is in crisis it can be hard to know what to do. Some of us get so tangled up in our worry about doing the wrong thing, we fail to reach out at all.

Others of us know exactly what that person needs and, with a heart full of love, barge in with an unwanted, albeit lovely, tray.

It is such a relief to remember that there is grace for all of us, still.

Filed Under: Be Haven, Eden, grace, love

Mourning before Easter

April 8, 2012 by Alison Hodgson Leave a Comment

Eden’s sick.

It started this afternoon with some bumps on her forehead that began to itch. Soon her whole face was red, inflamed and her head was hot.

I don’t know if she is having an allergic reaction to something she touched outside or if she has a virus.

Paul carried her up to bed and I tucked her in.

We talked about the video we watched earlier and how much we love it. We talked about Jesus and what he did for us. 
“It’s just so amazing and beautiful.” she said, yawning and turning to her side, snuggling in.
I stroked her hair, “It is, your’e right.”
“But it’s sad too.”

And then she began to cry about the new house, about how building it we lost so many of the trees that made it through the fire. In particular we lost the climbing tree, a large maple, that stood in the middle of our front yard.

“I was just getting tall enough to climb it, but I never got to.” She cried and I cried with her.

We talked about all the trees that were lost, some to the fire and others when we broke ground for the new house, despite our every effort to save them all. It is especially painful to have lost so much, to take stock of what remains, and then to lose that too. For Eden, losing her garden and the trees was  deep sorrow.

We talked about mourning, how the Bible says that blessed are those who mourn for they will be comforted.

“I didn’t know that,” she said.

We talked about what mourning looks like: letting God know that you’ve been let down and telling him how that makes you feel. It’s also choosing to hope. I encouraged Eden to pray for a climbing tree.

“Mom, I know all the trees. I walk through our woods almost every single day.”

But we prayed and asked.

Please pray for my girl.

Filed Under: Eden, mourning, the fire

Booties

April 7, 2012 by Alison Hodgson 1 Comment

Since Eden first got Oliver she has been wanting to get him some booties to wear. Yesterday I noticed that our local pet supply store had all their dog clothes marked way down, so we brought her back to check things out. I actually only saw coats and sweaters, but Eden found a little bag of booties right away, as well as a matching parka. Oliver has been needing one…apparently.
We emptied out the shopping cart full of sales clothes hunting for a parka in his size but no luck. We did score a little utility jacket, I kid you not.
We had been home about 30 seconds when Eden and Christopher were putting the booties on Oliver.

Sadly,  they were too big.  Eden slapped the jacket on him next and that was too small. We have decided to return everything tomorrow and bring Oliver with us to ensure the fit.

Filed Under: Eden, laughter, love, Oliver

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