Alison Hodgson

Expert on the etiquette of perilous times.

by 1 Comment

One of the crappy things about my job is that I don’t always know when I am doing well, that is being a good mother.  In some situations good mothering feels like bad, for example, when you are required to peel off  a sobbing Kindergartner,  hand her to an aide and gently shut the classroom door on both of them.  Walking down the hall you might tell yourself that it’s Monday, the child is: tired, missing her dad and still processing yesterday’s frosting fest.  You may recall how you lovingly tucked her in the night before and then got her up and going, jollying her through all the morning preparations.  You might even remind yourself of how strong willed this child is and that she doesn’t need the message if she whines and cries loud enough and drags her feet long enough, she will get her way.  But none of this will keep you from bursting into tears when you get into your car to drive home.  Or at least it didn’t keep me.

I am tired too and sick.  I’m reminding myself of all the reasons why this is especially hard for me today as well.  And I’m praying.
UPDATE:  In the heat of the moment I promised to come to school for lunch.  It didn’t help the situation, but I had to follow through, whether or not she remembered.  Christopher and I got there early and sat at the end of her class’ table.  She sailed in with her class, gave us both a hug and then went and sat between a couple of her friends on the other end of the table.  I chatted with the aide who told me that Eden accompanied her to the office with attendance and after that she was fine.  When it was time to go to recess, she started wrapping around me again, but managed to divest myself with no tears from her or me.

https://alisonhodgson.com/2008/12/349/

by 2 Comments

We decorated the tree this afternoon and evening.  It was a relaxed and lazy day.  We had ice cream for dinner and then Christopher made up a couple bowls of popcorn to munch on while they watched a Christmas video.  Lydia and Eden doubled up in one of the chairs to share a bowl.  I glanced over at them, Eden perched on Lydia’s lap, Lydia’s arm around her, patting her leg lovingly like I do and was struck by how sweet and sisterly they looked.
Lydia is only eleven, but at 5′ 5″ and gaining, she is looking more and more like a young lady and she has always been an old soul.  Eden is almost six and getting so big, but is still little and definitely the baby of our family.    At this stage the five and a half years between them is so vast.  Looking at them this evening I imagined them both grown, perhaps with children of their own, the years between them nothing at all.
I wanted to take a picture of them together, as they are today, a big and little sister, but Paul is away with our camera.  And then I remembered Photobooth and took the photo above.

https://alisonhodgson.com/2008/12/351/

by 1 Comment

Eden is up, though it’s almost 10:00 pm.  She has a cold and after weeping off and on for two hours and begging us to let her sleep with us we relented.  Paul and I were lounging on our bed playing on our laptops.  The second we told Eden she was in, she shot back to her room for her pillow and a blanket.  She snuggled in between us and began to chittety chat our ears off.  I turned to her, looked into her sleepy eyes and asked her if she would like to sip a little “rasberry tea” (a magnesium drink that helps us sleep) and read a little Laura Ingalls.  She did.  As I walked to the kitchen she called after me, 
“I’ll save your spot!”
My heart, already soft, melted.  
That the bed is mine, that it’s always my spot and not in need of saving doesn’t really matter does it?  It’s good to be chosen.
And now I’m going to choose her back.

https://alisonhodgson.com/2008/09/393/