Saturday 2:35 a.m.

Awake with a start to Birdie in the doorway, “I’m sorry, Mama, I threw up.”

Jumped out of bed and got her to the bathroom where she miraculously made it to the toilet, cleaned her up and put her back in bed and tried to gently stroke her forehead until I realized I was passing out, kissed her and stumbled back to bed, stopping only to call Paul (who had gone back to work with an emergency) and mumble incoherently for a few minutes before hanging up and falling asleep.

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Sunday 3:35 a.m.

Dreamt someone was screaming and awoke to the thought, “Must stop screaming lest it wakes our guests” In my dream they were specific people, but once I awoke I realized we had no guests and later realized they weren’t real people. Lept out of bed and ran yelling, “Mama’s coming!” to the girls’ room, pushed open the door and saw Beanie, dressed only in a diaper, standing in the corner of her crib screaming, “My poopie is hurting my bottom!” Lydia was half awake and muttering unintelligibly. I grabbed the Bean, laid her on the floor, extracted the painful poo, put a fresh diaper on and redressed her. Holding her I didn’t know quite what to do. I was so tired I could barely stand. I know it’s like a horror movie and you’re all yelling, “Get out of there! Run!!!!!”

It’s so easy to know what to do when you are sitting in the audience. On the screen it gets a little confusing.

So I brought her back to bed with me where Paul was still lying comatose and tucked her in between us. She immediately started sucking her thumb and snuffling her blankie. We both were out like a light in seconds.

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Sunday 8:00 a.m.

Awoke to two little feet in my side and Paul asking, “How did this happen?”

I wanted to say a little something about Paul today but had a very busy running around sort of day and didn’t really blog at all.

He has had a lot going on at work, late nights, new and big responsibilities, some travel he was planning on, as well as another trip that piggy backs the first. He just found out about the second trip this week. He will be gone for four days, be back for our anniversary on one day, the Big Kids’ profession of faith on the second and then gone again for five days. Yippee!

He has had a breathless week, the sort where he is rushing from one thing to the next and being pulled in ten different directions constantly. Tonight he came home tired and a little stressed. Fridays are our movie nights which means all of us change into our jammies as soon as Paul gets home, eat dinner sitting on the living room floor, light candles and watch a video. Tonight we had a fire too. It is a good way for us to ease into the weekend as a family.

After we got the girls in bed he checked his e-mail and realized there was something he needed to do at the office. This was at 10:30. So he is back at work. He is not a workaholic, just a hard working guy who is currently under a lot of demands on his time.

Babe, I’m proud of you. I understand that you are doing a lot of juggling to keep me and the kids, your commitments at church and all your responsibilities at work from falling to the ground. Thank you for working hard and living as your word. I respect and love you and am very grateful I get to be

Your Ali

“I am going to Nanica (Canada) like Wennie (her cousin, Ren).

“I’m going to miss you.”

“Ahm goin to miss you too.”

“I love you!”

“Ah love you too.”

She was gone for about 2 seconds before returning as a cat named Milo.

I really need to dash as I am a black and white “Mudder Kitty” and Milo is in constant danger from “shocksies” (sharks).

……………………….

I was just asked to help her remove her jeans as she is wanting to be a Koala Bear. Removed the pants and was rewarded with a line she picked up from her brother,

“Sanks Mom, you’re a lifesaver.”

1. My dad was a terrible singer…terrible…all nasally and tone deaf.

2. And yet he sang a good amount: in church, while shaving, and on Saturday or Sunday mornings to his Mahalia Jackson records.

3. He had one song for shaving and was usually content to belt out one line, “In my old rendezvous, where I first met you.” It’s because of this that when I first read the word that looked like, “Ren Dezz Vus” I was able to quickly pluck the real pronunciation from my auditory memory.

For the first time I wonder if he was picturing a place when he was singing that song.

I can’t write down every word The Bean says, but I should – it’s that good. She has been a kitten practically nonstop. She has taken to licking her paw, I mean fist, in a manner disturbingly like a real kitten and when not meowing talks in a kitteny little voice. Last night she wouldn’t let me be the Mother Cat and instead was snuggling up to someone imaginary in the corner of the couch. I really protested that. Today she relented and I almost blew it forgetting that she was a kitten,

“I am a kitten” she meowed, “and you are the Mudder Cat.”

Tonight we put her in some new footed jammies that are a pale pink. She was all soft and cuddly. I put her in her crib and then was stroking her back before prayers. She relaxed and stretched out, sighing and I thought how extraordinary it is that you can kiss children goodnight, touch them gently and appropriately, pray with them and in so doing create a safe place.

If that’s not amazing power…

Rocking the cradle, Baby.