Alison Hodgson

Expert on the etiquette of perilous times.

Happy Tuesday

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Tonight I resisted the lure of the computer and turned off the light at before 10:00 and quickly fell asleep.

A boy and his dog awoke me at 11:18 because the boy needed instructions for turning off the alarm since he thought the dog needed to go outside one last time.
The dog just wanted to run around the deck and eat poopsicles which he did for a while ignoring the boy’s cries to go to his spot or to come inside.
Finally I stormed out to the living room just as the dog pranced to the door.  The boy and the dog hustled back to bed while I locked up and reactivated the alarm.
It is now 1:47 and if you think I am happy to still be awake…
Well, I’m not. 

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I miss my husband.

He is flying somewhere over the heartland as I write.

This is the tenth day of his absence and that, my friends, is too long. He is back for just a short time then off again for an even longer trip, returning shortly before Christmas.

At times I have felt a physical pain missing him.

These absences are like small deaths.

Things have gone amazingly well on the home front, that’s what prayer and vitamins and astonishly low priorities get you. Or maybe it’s what having your priorities astonishly clear (prayer, good nutrition, loving on the kids) gets you.

Paul’s mom is still here cleaning. She had to run a brief errand, so I am breathing here. She’s kicking my can, God bless her. She loves to clean which is a mystery to me. It is humbling to let someone into my actual (as opposed to metaphorical- I mean, Hello! what would I have to blog about?) mess.

Some big things have been happening inside me this week. Oh dear, that sounds like a pubescent girl’s diary entry. Remind me to tell you about despair and surrender, about holding on and hanging in there, about choosing love and staying engaged, about crying it all out and then breathing in, breathing out, about smiling more and choosing to appreciate, about choosing to love, about choosing to love, about choosing to love and being delighted when I was chosen to be loved too.

https://alisonhodgson.com/2007/12/599/