As the year came to a close I have been wished, more than once, a better year in 2011. It’s strange to think, and impossible to qualify, that 2010, the year someone burned my house down, wasn’t the worst one of my life. But how do you measure and compare the goodness of years?
The quote above by Annie Dillard, I had written down and tucked it above our calendar. I found it, smoke stained and crumpled, on one of my early trips back to the house. Obviously it said something for me, as I found it evocative enough to copy and hang so that I could see it often.
It’s a commonly known metaphor of the purification by fire. Dross burns away and what is of value remains. This little quote went through the fire, literally and figuratively.
I am expectant. Great things are going to happen in 2011. Mark my words. And I know it is important to be mindful of the future, to set goals, be specific, write things down, look at the big picture, but I want to look at it all. I’m going to stop measuring my life in years. This is my life, moment by moment for all the time I have left. I refuse to be on hold until the insurance comes in, until the house is rebuilt and we move in, until my kids are trouble free and Paul is perfect, until my book is published and I get back into a size 8.
I want to spend it well.
Happy New Year.